HOW SHEER FAITH IN MASTER DOES WONDERS TO YOU AND HOW HE MOULDED ME
During its preliminary stage or you can say childhood, like a river flows very freely down steep slopes , unaware or uncared for journey ahead , my early days were also very free-unaware of the challenges ahead.
During my high school and college days, I faced some hurdles, obstacles in my journey-very similar to the meandering river course during the mid journey of river
We’re told to become independent and we strive to become one, but when we become independent materialistically, we find that we’ve become more dependent mentally than ever. Its my experience. I was groomed by my parents and siblings to become independent in life, to stand on my own feet. They were successful as far as materialistic independency is concerned, but within myself I began to hate my life. People – my neighbors, my relatives, my peers thought and said nothing better cud happen with my life but deep within, I dreaded every day of my life. I wont say every moment or hour coz sometimes I was really on cloud nine though apparent
Life’s a crucible where we like raw earthen pots are moulded, baked and made strong enough to face the forthcoming challenges
However, and whatever favorable or unfavorable circumstances maybe, my string off gloom continues to stretch. Sometimes I feel that as God has given me so much so early in life, hence I’m suffering so much for no real reason. I just clang onto one or the other petty issues which are just unavoidable in life and keep on sulking over it, go down deeper and deeper into gloom and wonder how to live further coz frankly speaking I don’t have the courage to commit suicide though my mental state is very conducive to it now.
The moment I feel I can swallow or continue with present state of affairs, something or the other happens which force me to go back to my gloom
God’s ways are really very mysterious, unpredictable. You just need to leave yourself in His hands, then just be a witness to your life coz your life is not yours, its His. He has all power to mould it the way He wants.
Life is very unfair. I do not say God is not fair, infect it is His fairness which gives us strength to live in this unfair world, but now I wish to join you Lord over there. I can’t continue here anymore just give me peace forever. I have received more than my share here and I ought to have returned to this world but I just can’t continue living. Suddenly life has lost its meaning for me. But perhaps I’m wrong; because life is given to me to chastise myself, though O Lord you know that I’m yours but you want me to be perfect; which I thought I shall attain in this life but Lord I’ve lost my zeal to live in want of that perfection and now I just want my end perhaps, this all is happening so that I may realize true meaning of life i.e. my true aim-self realization. Till now I used to study only in religious books that Human Birth is an opportunity to redeem ourselves of our past mistakes and stop this process of rebirth. Now I’m so disgusted with life (even though I’ve achieved every desired thing in life-for a girl of my age) that I practically feel that I must now pull-up my socks and go all out to stop this process of rebirth, life is a constantly growing phenomenon and a point comes in everyone’s life when one is forced to face this eternal truth. We have read or listened n no of times that life is a water bubble that may burst anytime. So instead of ruing over the intricacies of life we must realize that if we are living why not make the best of it and try to bring peace in ours and in the life of our near and dear ones because peace is everything –it is happiness, satisfaction and end of all desires.
When you can’t continue to live anymore you are too much rooted to ur values that you can’t compromise on them. Life becomes too thorny to walk on, ask God to show you the way out. Life appears too gloomy to moves on, too heavy to carry forward, just let life unfold itself at its own pace, flow with the wind. Life is a paradox it is full of opposing things –the sooner this dwells upon you the better
O Lord when’ll this all end. I can’t take this anymore. You say and I believe very honestly that your the doer, we are just agents. Problem is that we relate ourselves with the body. But what is our fault in this? O Lord ‘please come and do something. Things are getting out off control. Everything is being misplaced and mismanaged. We know the correct place but things are so obscure that they overshadow whatever feeble light is there. Please God show us the enlightened path.
The requirement is we need to tightly hold to His feet and when this hold starts to loosen up coz it becomes to even place faith at times of utter disappointment, what we need is to ask Him
Its similar to when parts of a tree are pruned so that it may grow in a better way God through troubles prune us so that we may grow more, more effectively, more efficiently. We see less deserving people get what we deserve very rightly and this is acknowledged by them too but ultimately we are termed loser because it is the end result that matters not whether one is deserving or not. But maybe and this comes true most of the times that we deserve much more than we think and in the end we get that what we deserve not what we want. This is something we all know and we often give solace to our friends mentioning this to them when they meet repeated failure, but when we get something which seem too insignificant in front of so called what we deserve, we don’t apply this fact to our lives. Its tough, very tough to meet repeated failures but believe Him, He has really, really something better for us.
We need to have lots and lots of patience to keep moving in a direction which we dislike but the goal is something which to overcome all our troubles. The point is we need to vie for that is eternal not just for temporal pleasures’
Life makes us endure such situations which no one has imagined in wildest dreams. Sometimes I feel and I know that what is happening is Blessing in Disguise for me. But ultimately it sinks in your deep thought process that whatever is happening is to teach you something. Till now I had bookish knowledge, I no doubt handled situations once in a while with great tact but still I had to learn a lot when it came to face hostile conditions and life was teaching me exactly that. if I had to judge myself when it came to see where I stand in terms of worldly matters then I’m in kindergarten.so how can my life end without teaching me? I have to learn lot many tact’s in life’s university where daily a test is conducted.
There’s always a better or different way of doing things-big or small and life is constant process of this discovery and in this journey we undergo through innumerable pleasant and unpleasant situations this time for me my difficult patch has extended far too much and I’m unable to stand firmly on the ground, my feet are getting thrust inward the earth wet by my apparent sorrow ,then one fine morning something favorable happens and I find my feet firmly on ground .its then when I think that now I must prepare myself to fight with circumstances to save myself from falling into gloom again. But soon I realize that one must not fight –specially someone like me who’s too sensitive-one who can’t take smallest wound without crying. Its like trying to separate water in 2 parts by hitting it with a stick.
the fruits are ripen by carbide, but they don’t taste as delicious as when they get ripen naturally. Similar is my plight right now. Those who see me troubled say that
We need to do this. So what if we can’t change the system, we can at least change ourselves –we need to shed our inhibitions which prevent us from uttering a few loud, harsh but true words in our workplace. Actually the case with me is that I want to be good with everyone and I had been successful thus far but I need to realize that the sooner I shed this conception of mine, the better coz you can’t do 2 things at the same time i.e. being good to everyone and live your steel strong principles. Only one thing happens then-your life becomes miserable, impossible to move on result you drag ur self with life-but someday or other it dwells on you that you can’t continue anymore-u ask for strength from Lord-but you feel as though He too helps only those who are confident on themselves and those who help themselves. Now He makes His next dashing move—-u get lots of unseen energy from somewhere and you begin to teach ur self—this is the most valuable thing in one’s life-when one becomes ones own teacher-u begin to wonder how to prove ur self to ur self coz we need to prove ourselves to ourselves not to world-when we
Now comes the time when I realize that its challenge how to stay aloof from all what is happening around me i.e. obviously I can’t or for that matter rarely anyone gets what he or she wants. People say do whatever you can to get what you want else you’ll be forced to like what you get but its not so coz we can’t change our destiny-yes we can shape it to suit what we feel is right I mean our destiny is pre-decided but we can modify ourselves I mean on our solid base which our elders shaped .it is said students need more concentration power as they’ve lot to study and also to qualify exams while adults or those who work can do away even if their focus is feeble, but its not so coz we need to be very focused every moment in our life so that we do not falter not in others eye but in our eye. we need to be focused on our ultimate aim, so that our principles, our values do not get compromised, we need to be focused so that we at least stay where we were not let ourselves be dragged behind no matter how much this cruel world or unfavorable circumstances be. when favorable conditions arrive we need to move ahead from where we left. This life is like any sport like say for example cricket-you play the ball on its merit –you shove away the bouncers or tough balls –u need to keep ur self alive at the crease-doesn’t that need immense concentration and the need of the hour is we need to keep our mind-body fit no matter how down life tries to drag us, coz then only proper coordination of mind and body can result so that we save our wicket and our stay at crease continues.
At times I feel that perhaps life is in a hurry to teach me lot of things-how cruel this world is-how selfish people are-how to deal with difficult people. I had thought that like it had happened till now that people usually were easy going if one was very polite and gentle with them-even if they said unpleasant words behind but they were very favorable in front and this is what matters
Its when you are surrounded by most gloomy of conditions, the best comes out of you. Initially it feels like you cannot continue anymore though deep within you know that you have to go on and on. when it feels like world comes crashing down, that’s exactly when God intervenes to tell something, and you realize that it only when you venture in deep seas do you realize how deep the waters are. its only then that you can confidently decide which direction to take-whether to go further or be at same level or as in my case change your direction-I mean don’t want to be at same level, nor do I want to go further in same direction deeper waters.
The more problematic life appears to be; the higher goal Lord has set for us. only we are not able to orient ourselves but nothing to worry coz like Pole star guides ships towards their destination similarly some unknown force leads us even tho we are unable to recognize Him and life seems totally out of control, unmanageable, have faith in Him He’ll pull us out of rough waters.t he more difficult time is, we need to keep more restraint and not let ourselves from getting ourselves into cocoon of sadness, we need to remember that we are His Masterpieces and it takes times for a lump of soil to be moulded into beautiful and strong pot..then we are living miracles, so let time take its course to make us into wonders………..what’s the deal if things go as predicted with some disappointments here and there? Even diamond has to go through cutting before final .So more hardships means more importance being added to our stature and exactly at this time my Master stepped in.I had stopped writing but He chided me to renew it.I said to myself-who will like to read distressing thoughts. now I will write about You.You will make me write .Till now I was in chaos.You will systematize my life.This has been arranged by Divine Will that You will manage me,my life.
.He invisibly loved me but when my complaints grew insurmountably,He appeared in the form of my Angel and then He started moulding me. Firstly,He collected the widely scattered pieces of my identity and then began the tedious task of reconstructing my battered self.
When I met my Guru,it was like He was watching me and sending me cosmic energy through prism because for 10 long years I have revolved around His presence(place of work) in various locations.On reaching Him,my Sun(my Master)discarded the prism and shone on my life with His full Brilliance.
Hope is the last thing Human Beings can relinquish.My condition had become hopeless.I was tired of hoping.I wanted to die but didn’t have courage.The Hope entered my life in the form of my Master.Here is a Man who really lived for others.Each moment of His life-He has given for welfare of othrs.We often complain that life has become so busy that We don’t have time for ourselves.Sometimes,very foolishly I made this complaint to Him.In answer,He made a very overwhelming complaint-He cared and prayed for so many disciples that He wished He had more time so that more people could be benefitted.
Master just can’t be described in words.He can’t be contained in wordly expressions.Everything is divine in Him.Just being in His presence is enough to make one realize this.He is letting me praise Him in these pages is itself His Benevolence because He is the last person on this earth to let anyone praise Him.this is because He wants me to be happy.I will be happy when I do what I love the most.
The extent to which our Preceptor helps His disciples cannot be imagined.During my initial days under His Mentorship,I was so indifferent that once I bluntly stated that I may go back to my old ways.He said nothing but silently continued to work for my upheaval.To state in a nutshell,I’ll narrate a familiar story:I was walking on sands of time.Looking backwards ,I saw two pairs of footsteps(one God’s,other mine).but during difficult times I saw only one pair.I questioned Him as to why He left me during difficulties.He replied that the single pair of footsteps were His.He carried me during difficulties.
Surrendering oneself to our Preceptor is what we require.even for this if we find some constraints,then ask for His help for us increase our faith in Him and He grants us.He not only carries us on the designated path but ensures that we endure minimum possible delusion on the way.Surrender at His feet includes the knowledge of the fact that He is capable and you want Him to change your thoughts as He wishes.It is like one must hold the hand of person who loves you rather than expecting Him to hold you.Like a childs needs to cry to make his mother realize that he is hungary,similarly our earnest cry is required,leave the rest to Him.
He has always been with us during our Trials and Tribulations.My Preceptor has made me realize that form is temporary but class is permanent and when one is going through lean patch in life,its just to make one realize that all this is delusion and to feel the reality of present happenings will only make us suffer unnecessarily. And ultimately the hollowness of materialistic existence dawns.Time and again,by His grace,I have asked for His forgiveness because if one goes by ordinary means,we cannot atone for numerous sins committed by us without going through unimaginable apparent troubles.
One could get tired of many things but my Preceptor never got tired of making me realize that I was unique.One things that’s affirms His sublime greatness is that whatever He says on a particular day,the meaning is realized some other day or when we require that the most.I mean to say that what He says and what He means may be drastically different and He ensures that the essence of His utterance reaches the right person.
My Preceptor is the epitome of the best features in East and West.He teaches us by His own example.Though He does not need to carry on with the business He once set,yet only for the sake of His disciples like me who can try to seek excuse of renouncing the world to escape from vicissitudes of life,He maintains perfect balance between spirituality and materialism.
Our Preceptor takes our care in such a way that when initially we enter His patronage,its like entry of a dust particle into a shell and within a span of time we are transformed into an unimaginable pearl.We just need to have unflinching Faith in Him.For this also,we need His blessings.THE MORE FAITH WE HAVE IN HIM,THE MORE RAPID AND PROFOUND PROGRESS WE MAKE.Every next moment one discovers new dimension of His Greatness and I cannot stop admiring my fortune because though I’m not able to come out of my apparent gloom,yet I realize that how subtly He has transformed me.Actually,life can hit anyone in hardest of ways.Its not about hitting it back.Its all about being hit in the hardest of ways and still moving ahead.This is what He ensures.
Moon shines by the reflected from the Sun.Our Preceptor is the Sun and as Moon appesrs to be growing each dayfrom New-Moon to Full-Moon because the light reflected from the Sun grows each day.Similarly,our whole life is like the moon,receiving our Preceptors Grace each moment and each day shining with more and more glory.Distances,Technologies and Logics do not matter when we have Preceptor’s grace(the only qualification is absolute surrender)and He leaves no stone unturned to bring out the Masterpiece in us.
Every Human Bieng is potentially Divine.We know this but after few failure consider ourselves weak and surrender ourselves to fate.The reason is we do not realize our Divine nature and do not take necessary steps in that direction.The result-we waste our vast potentialities in unnecessary stresses considering them real.To elaborate,we have suppressed our infinite capabilities.In this scenario,our Preceptor steps in.He channelizes the huge untapped storehouse,orients flow of our thoughts(much more powerful than actions)in constructive way so that this world could be a better place to live in.To give an example,He is making me write all this.
The culmination of realization of desires of all previous births took place when my Preceptor took us on trip to Vrindavan.Here I was,literally moving with God;who not only makes life easy for me but makes me realize how to cherish life little moments and create happiness out of apparent nothing.He has so many disciples-all very unpredictable-yet He moulds each pot according to His/Her aptitude.On that trip,He gave us the Key to the Lock which once opened would give that infinite bliss which we desperately long for but which we have lost deep inside us in pursuit of material happiness.
He actually wants us to unlock the door which is opened inside.The next He modified the technique to suit our individual needs.For example,He indicated that first as one enters inwards,there will be a heap somewhat damp bundle of sticks.By His Grace,first I need to dry them in the sunshine present in each one of us.Then,we have to discover the spark which is present in each one of us but has been long and deeply buried with a beautiful covering inside the soil of numerous constraints-family pressure,peer pressure,social obligations, etc,.Once this spark is uncovered,we have to ignite that bundle of woods.Let them burn completely.To explain the concept more clearly,He quoted the sacred words of His Master-“The seeds of past karma cannot germinate once they are roasted in the fires of Divine Wisdom”.
When God sends us to a Self-Realised soul to Guide us,suddenly life takes a drastic turn.To begin with one gets the immense satisfaction that our infinite potential is being properly harnessed.As Preceptor has realized His Real stature,His infinite potential,He goes to any extent to direct us,at the same time,He leaves no stone unturned to subtly assure that He cares.This is because it is Human tendency to expect someone to affirm the He cares.Our preceptor finds numerous subtle ways to give this assurance and simultaneously ensures that we do not become too dependent on Him.His assurance is not shallow because being direct Manifestation of Lord,He has realized His infinite potential.
None of His utterances are made lightly.When my unorganized and unbalanced ways became too adverse on my life,He ventured and Himself set an example to show how balance in one’s mind and soul can direct balance in our physique whatever the given task.I’m highly priviledged to quote the instance which will elaborate the above point-When He took us on trip to Vrindavan,despite having a troubled back,He nonetheless pulled a rickshaw for a while while we were on pilgrimage around Govardhan Hill.
I would quote another eye-opening incident on that trip.When we completed the 21km round of Govardhan Hill,it was quite dark but artificial lights sufficed.Suddenly,current went off for about 20 seconds.My Preceptor was near me yet I yelled for God.Actually,He gave practical demonstration of God’s omnipresence and conveyed us essence of that Parikrama.That moment symbolized that only light can evade darkness and our Preceptor is that light at the end of tunnel.The round of the Hill symbolized that the way Lord held the Hill on His Little Finger and protected His village people and herd from tremendous rains;similarly,He carries the load of our apparent responsibilities.
On that trip we were priviledged to bow our Heads at the junction of Engineering and religious marvel.The Vaishno Devi shrine.
By Lord’s grace,I have got much in life and by my Preceptor Grace,I have realized this.Now,its time to return i.e. life demands from us its share.Then why I’m retracting my steps.why this happens with all of us that once reaching some milestone,when life demands its due;we freeze.Our fears overpower us to such extent that we appear to be caught in a whirlpool and yet we know that this is illusion.This is where our Preceptor steps in.He makes us realize that Pain is inevitable but Suffering is optional.